Celebrate your Love - with a Handfasting, Commitment or Union Ceremony
Personally co-created for you by Ishara, Civil Celebrant for Fremantle & Perth, Western Australia
Sometimes you either do not wish, or are not legally entitled, to formalise your relationship with a legal solemnisation of marriage. (Perhaps you may be considering having a legal wedding later on, or maybe not.) But that doesn't mean you have to miss out on a wedding experience!
If you are looking for a celebrant who will listen respectfully and without judgement to your needs and ideas for your special day, you need look no further...
Many couples who are exploring alternatives to a legal wedding are uncertain as to what might be involved in holding a commitment ceremony or handfasting. In what way is it similar or different to a traditional marriage ceremony?
The answer is, it can be as similar or different as you yourselves wish.
My role as the celebrant is to work with you to create a union ceremony which feels like an authentic expression of the two people you are and the relationship you are co-creating together.
Handfasting - Tying the Knot
Handfasting
is an old European folk-custom which pre-dates the Christianisation of marriage.
For those folk for who had no need to enter into contractual arrangements
about the endowment of property, getting married was a relatively simple matter
of declaring your intention in the witness of your local community.
One way to do this was to have your hands ceremonially bound together with
ribbon or cord, symbolising your intention to join your lives and fortunes
- hence the term handfasting. Traditionally a handfasting might initially
be made for a year and a day, a form of 'trial marriage' which left the couple
free to part at the end of this time if no child was concieved.
The tradition of handfasting has been popularised by contemporary neo-pagans. These handfasting ceremonies often take place within a circle and incorporate other symbolic ritual elements such as calling in the elements - air, fire, water and earth - and the four directions - east, north, west and south - to bring blessings to the union.
Commitment Ceremony, Union Ceremony or Betrothal Ceremony
The contemporary concept of a commitment ceremony is very similar to the original intention of handfasting, in that it creates a formal opportunity for the loving couple to pledge their love and commitment to each other and in front of a witness. Some couples will invite their community of friends and family to witness and bless their union. Others choose to hold the ceremony privately in the presence of the celebrant alone.
Either way, a union or commitment ceremony may be a full traditional wedding - simply omitting the legal documents required to formally register a marriage according to Australian law. Or it may fill the role of a betrothal ceremony, marking a stepping stone in the deepening of the relationship that does not preclude the possibilty of a legal wedding further down the track. Although a commitment or union ceremony does not involve legal paperwork, you may still wish to include the signing of a keep-sake certificate as a personal record of the occasion.
What Happens in a Commitment Ceremony
The heart of a handfasting, commitment or union ceremony is the formal exchange of promises - the 'vows' - which may use traditional wording or be composed by the couple for the occasion. Sometimes couples will also choose to speak spontaneously from their own hearts. On the whole it is a sound idea to give some significant thought to the wording of the commitment you are making to each other, and to what following through on that commitment might look like in practice.
For most people, symbolic action is another important element of a ceremony of this kind. In this we can draw on inspiration from any of the world's cultural or religious traditions. Many of the symbolic rituals associated with weddings focus upon symbolically enacting the union the two individuals as they commit themselves to a shared future within the relationship. Many couples choose to exchange rings as part of their ceremony - although there is no requirement to do so.
Taking the Next Step
As your celebrant, my commitment is to hold a space for you to have a ceremony that fits with your shared values and is an authentic expression of the love that has brought you together. As your officient, I'll be there to guide the two of you, and any guests you choose to invite, smoothly through the process of creating and enacting your ceremony, so that you can focus on allowing yourselves to feel the love and blessings of your special day.
If you would like to explore whether a non-traditional form of wedding or commitment ceremony might suit you, I'd be delighted to answer any questions you may have.
Contact the celebrant today to check my availability for your preferred ceremony date!